Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
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