Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
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Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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