We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
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