I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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