hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize