It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
God I need to hump something, right now.
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