Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
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shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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