I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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