Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize