that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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