we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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