Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize