mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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