I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
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