whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
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