I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize