if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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