those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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