He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
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