We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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