Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize