Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
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I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
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Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
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