That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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