Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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