remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
No stitches, just platelets and will power
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
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