Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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