I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize