I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
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