I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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