And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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