How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Randomize