He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize