I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
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I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
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ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I believe in your delicious
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
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