i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize