once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
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Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
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It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
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