Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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