Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize