He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
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