I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
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