my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
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