oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize