The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize