It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
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You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
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Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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