I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
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