bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
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