You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
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