did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize