Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
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