Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
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I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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