I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
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I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
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Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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